Have you shared a part of yourself to only have another invalidate your feelings . . . or worse, try to one-up you? I think many, if not most of us, have been there, either as a witness or a recipient. It wounds as the recipient and makes me cringe as a witness. I’ve learned and will continue to learn the life-long lesson—it isn’t about me. Ultimately, the attack, the disparaging words, the eye-roll, the sigh . . . it’s not about me, it’s about them. It’s not about you; it’s about them.
So, in a world where the hurt is inevitable, what can you do? For me, I try, and at times through tears and pain, remind myself of that truth—and to be honest, sometimes I have to practically tape a note to my head—IT’S NOT ABOUT ME. Now, it is just as pervasive to see others wounded by a callous word or act. What can you do? Here I am reminded of the words of Ann Voskamp, “We aren’t here to one-up another, but to help one another up.” So, when I witness the wound, the sting, the bleeding , I receive my marching orders—give, lend, comfort, encourage, reassure . . . love. Treat the wounded the way I want to be treated. As with most things that matter, it can be hard to put into practice BUT always worth its weight in gold.
One committed to processing truth, finding light in the darkness, savoring the simple, and living fully.